Don't blame anyone but yourself

All too often woman and men play the blame game and yet the things that they blame on one another for are usually something that they are both doing in their relationship. Discussing an issue with a close friend brought this post out of me because he kept saying over and over “anything that comes out a females mouth I will not believe. No matter what I do its never enough for them”. I just went on to say well maybe your just messing with the wrong ones but when I hung up I felt his pain. Why do men and woman do that to one another? Why if a man OR a woman cheat, does it automatically have to be their lover’s fault? Is it not bad enough that you are hurt about the situation at hand that you had to be blamed for pain that you know in your heart you didn’t self inflict? Or why does the one person that loves you have to work so hard to mend a wound someone else threw salt on? These are questions that we all ask when we come across situations like such. I don’t have the answer to all of these questions but the many experiences that I have had in my life have brought me to my own conclusions.

When men or woman cheat, I feel like they blame their lovers because it is a vulnerable moment. You tell them that you did what you did because they weren’t treating right, they weren’t giving you what you wanted or you weren’t getting enough attention from them so you got it else where. They beat on your self- esteem and make you feel like the bad guy because sooner or later you start to believe you were wrong and the harder it will be to leave when you snap back into reality. For the next question, I cannot stress it enough, and this is for both men and woman, that if you are fighting to win someone’s heart to know the difference between a wounded heart and manipulation. Ask yourself, do they really want you? Or are they holding on for you for when they are not feeling so great. What are you really fighting for? Enough said. Whether you are the cheater, the one being cheated on, the broken- hearted or the one fighting for it. Be smart and be real, when it is your fault, don’t blame anyone but yourself.